That Happy Place
I have my “Happy Place”. I’ve just been there in the photo above. Still salty and wet with the ring of my mask imprinted on my forehead, I’m sitting at peace with the world. Snorkeling in warm, clear, salt water is the place for me. The sun on my back and the fish darting this way and that, I can become part of their world. I’m not in a hurry. I hear each breath in my head, ears muffled by the water, slowly in and out, rhythmic and calm.
Happiness. We are taught to chase it. As if it is something we should have all the time. The constant wanting of something more. Of finding that happy place. But we wouldn’t even know happiness without experiencing sadness, anger, fear, loneliness and the host of other negative emotions we are able to fully feel as humans. What a gift it is that we are able to experience ALL if it.
I recently read an article about Ashley Frawley who has made happiness her profession — or rather questioning why everyone is so fixated on it. Self-esteem, mindfulness: These themes, she argues, are largely variations on the same fad, focused on explaining to people how they can control their own happiness … all without challenging the society whose policies may be making them unhappy in the first place. A focus on happiness can feel empowering for people, but it won’t materially change their circumstances. And, Frawley feels, it re-centers the individual’s internal lack of happiness as a problem to be fixed with medication or meditation — turning them into a patient rather than someone exercising agency and change.
I pondered this for a while after reading it. Indeed, policies can have a huge impact on an individual’s life, however, doesn’t it always come down to us finding our happiness INSIDE ourselves and not looking to the outside circumstance for it?
True, happiness does not change our circumstance nor does the circumstance change our happiness. It all comes from within. I believe that our thoughts about any circumstance are a choice. Whatever we think, will lead to a feeling which generates actions that lead to a result. We get to choose what we want to think. So from that place, what choice do you make? We don’t always want to be happy. When terrible things happen or we see actions that are unjust, we can feel an emotion and just allow it. When we allow ourselves to process and really feel whatever that emotion is, it gives us the space to make a deliberate intention on what we want to THINK about that circumstance. From a place of intention, we may choose a thought that results in something that serves us. Whether that serving is being happy and calm or angry and driven to action. Let the thought be your driver to get you to the end result that will best serve you.
As humans we have a truckload of emotions we get to experience, How liberating to know we have a choice.
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